Political Project Runway

Seemed appropo for th’present moment

BlogBlast for Peace ~ 06.04.08

Well, don’t just sit there…click on th’image t’get th’Understandin’.  Go on.

Th’ Cap’n Presents for Yer Viewing Pleasure

Once upon a time, it was easy t’be seein’ who be th’newest onboard so ye could throw them o’erboard when we rounded Th’Horn (any Horn, just pick one), but seein’ as there be two new or ‘newer’ Titles on Th’Mound — as well as two o’Me Ladies who’ve changed their position in Th’BlogSea — it seems th’Proper Thing t’do t’be makin’ certain-sure that ye know about ‘em. So, without further ado (contrarywise, ye can ‘ado’ all ye be wantin’ to, no skin off Me Knuckles):

Our Fair Second & Keeper o’ Th’Code, DCup, can be found at Unglued

Our Deft Able-SeaDyke, now reeflightning, be here - The Mind Nomadic

Th’Mound has an Artiste Originale in Frannie at Creatively Flowing

and then, th’newest, Our AstroVenturers: Co-Commanders Comet Rider & Space Girk, can be sighted at Lesbians from Space

Give ‘em a looksee, whether it be at their new berths or if ye’ve n’er seen them at all. That’s an order, but someone be bringing Me a tankard first!

Finally Someone Figured it Out

“This universe is not hostile, nor yet is it friendly. It is simply indifferent.” - John Haynes Holmes

From Neatorama.com: 10 Insulting Words Ye Should Know

1. FRENCHIFY (v)

Definition: 1) To make French in quality or trait 2) To make somewhat effeminate, and 3) To contract a veneral disease (a 19th century slang).

Analysis: We have the English to thank for this word. Most people implicitly understand that it means to become more like the French, but not a lot know the second or the third meaning. We’re still not sure which is more insulting.

4. COCCYDYNIA (n)

Definition: Pain in the butt.

Analysis: It’s a real medical term: coccydynia is pain in the coccyx or tailbone. Most people simply call it “buttache.”

Similar: PROCTALGIA, PROCTODYNIA, PYGALGIA and RECTALGIA all mean pain in the butt.

Alternative: CERVICALGIA (pain in the neck), PHALLODYNIA or PHALLALGIA (both mean pain in the penis), and PUDENDAGRA (pain in the genitals).

The word “butt” is highly versatile in its vernacular use - you can say “butt face” or “hairy butt” - dem are fightin’ words - but it’s much better to use these instead: ANKYLOPROCTIA (stricture of the anus, the state of “tight-assity”), STEATOPYGOUS (fat-assed), DASYPYGAL (having hairy buttocks), and CACOPYGIAN (having ugly buttocks).

7. HIRCISMUS (n)

Definition: Offensive armpit odor.

Analysis: Hircismus comes from the root word “hircus” which means goat in Latin. Someone must have thought smelly pits smelled like goats. Actually, this word combines two sources of great insult potential: smelly and armpits. Why this is not used more often in the discourse of hateful communication is beyond me.

Alternative: As we’ve mentioned, armpit is an untapped goldmine for insults. Here are some examples of words you can use: MASCHALEPHIDROSIS or MASCHALYPERIDROSIS (excessive sweating of the armpits). MASCHALOPHILOUS (sexual attraction to the underarms) and AXILLISM (the use of armpit for sex).

Smelling like goats is also a good source of insults (especially since goat is also a slang for a lecherous man). Try CAPRYLIC and HIRCINE (smelling like a pungent goat), and CAPRIC (resembling a goat).

9. FEIST or FICE (n)

Definition: 1) A small dog of uncertain ancestry, a mongrel. 2) A person of little worth or someone with a bad temper, and 3) Silent fart.

Analysis: You actually already know this word: feist is used throughout the Midland and Southern United States to mean a snappy, nervous and belligerent little dog. The adjective feisty which means “full of spirit or spunky,” comes from this word. But that’s not why it’s on this list (hint: #3!)

What you may not know is the true origin of the word. Feist comes from the Middle English fisten, which means to break wind (fist originally also meant flatus or fart). Feist is a special type of fart: the silent (and often deadly) type. Oh, and the word “fart” itself comes from another Middle English word farten or ferten, which in turn is from the Old English feortan.

Feist is the type of word that, if introduced to young adolescents, no doubt would spark a lifelong interest in learning new words.

Alternative: Fart is another one of those goldmines of insults. To obfuscate what you really mean, use instead: FLATUOSITY (fart). Other gems: EPROCTOLAGNIAC (someone aroused by flatulence, his own or someone else’s), CARMINATIVE (something that makes you fart), and BDOLOTIC (prone to farting).

10. CACAFUEGO (n)

Definition: A swaggering braggart or boaster.

Analysis: Cacafuego literally means “shit fire” in Spanish. Anyone who boasts their new knowledge of insulting words from this article can be called a cacafuego.

That’s not the only interesting thing about it:

Cacafuego is also the nickname of a 16th century Spanish galleon captured by Sir Francis Drake (El Draque or The Dragon as he was known to his Spanish victims). The ship’s original name was Nuestra Señora de la Concepción (Our Lady of Conception), but for some reason it’s called by her sailors as “cagafuego” (fireshitter) or “cacafuego” (shitfire).

It was Drake’s biggest plunder: it took his crew four days to transfer the cargo from the Cacafuego. In all, Drake got 80 pounds of gold, 26 tons of silver, 13 cases of silver coins, jewels, and more.

Synonym: BLATHERSKITE, BRAGGADOCIO, FANFARON, GASCONADER, and RODOMONTADE (English is full of this kind of word, though I think caca “shit fire” fuego is in a class of its own!)

Sail here t’be seein’ them all

Ta-Dah…Scissor Sisters, Gotta Love th’Wee Ones

Wanted

Really, that be th’name o’ th’movie…it is.

Aww, Puggles!

Cap’n Note: ‘Puggle’ be th’name for a playtypus wee one.

“Arguably the oddest beast in Nature’s menagerie, the platypus looks as if were assembled from spare parts left over after the animal kingdom was otherwise complete.

Now scientists know why. According to a study released Wednesday, the egg-laying critter is a genetic potpourri — part bird, part reptile and part lactating mammal. The task of laying bare the platypus genome of 2.2 billion base pairs spread across 18,500 genes has taken several years, but will do far more than satisfy the curiosity of just biologists, say the researchers.

“The platypus genome is extremely important, because it is the missing link in our understanding of how we and other mammals first evolved,” explained Oxford University’s Chris Ponting, one of the study’s architects. “This is our ticket back in time to when all mammals laid eggs while suckling their young on milk.”

Native to eastern Australia and Tasmania, the semi-aquatic platypus is thought to have split off from a common ancestor shared with humans approximately 170 million years ago. The creature is so strange that when the first stuffed specimens arrived in Europe at the end of the 18th century, biologists believed they were looking at a taxidermist’s hoax, a composite stitched together from the body of a beaver and the snout of a giant duck.”

Decode more here…

Ahhhhh, AJ

Th’Red Rectangle Nebula…an’ a Interstellar Virgin/Offspring Sightin’?

“Some believe aliens have landed in western Canada after seeing strange reflections appear almost nightly on the wall of a Calgary home.

“I looked out and I thought, ‘Oh my gosh, I’ve lost my mind,’” resident Karen Henuset said of the first time she saw the specters. “So I asked our nanny to come and take a look at this, and the hair on her arms just stood straight up.”

It’s as “clear as day. You see two eyes on each of them, they both have this little thing over their head. It’s a little weird,” said resident Reid Henuset.”

More here…

Th’ Cap’n Can Say No More…

Now THIS Be More Acceptable Iffin We Have t’be Gettin’ Animals Involved

Note that Fierce Jackalope Scowl…

Sad Day in th’Piratical World…Aye

Yoicks, Miniature Pintish Piratical Pixies! 2

Yoicks, Miniature Pintish Piratical Pixies!

Kerfuffle Me for a Pirate Queen, Th’ Cap’n could just squish ‘em between Me Fingers, they be so damned cute.